And some people wonder why they work the graveyard shift at Taco Bell……

Your boy Banter came across some late night/early morning ignance circa 1:45am in the Taco Bell drive through and I just had to share it with the ATI faithful. 

……enough said.

Lets get it together my people, get it together.

REASONable things to live by….

Passion has eased up going into year-end. With that said I got a quick rule for the ATI squad:

Never take connecting flights when traveling for a short weekend.

As I pointed out in a previous post Flying is a passionate affair. Absurd lines,  inept workers, generic delays, and my favorite treacherous flights (nonstop turbulence/unusual sounds) all reinforce my view that flying is a manifestation of passion.

With that said throwing in connections is pretty much guaranteed to up your passion levels even more. Think about it you are battling work passion, you are trying to minimize it by going somewhere for the weekend. You can’t really take a day off  so you decide to leave Friday night, then fly back Sunday afternoon.  But in order to do so you have to connect in “X” city. At this point Passion is already panning to drop it in your draws (DIIYD).

So you parlay said trip. You arrive in “X” city late due to any host of reasons (plain doesn’t work, plane arrives late to your gate, etc.). Then boom you are generically stuck in “X” city for a generically long time. You get to your final destination late or worse the next day. Now you have only one day to enjoy yourself. Then on Sunday the same ish happens on the way back. You either get to work on time with zero sleep or you have to take an unwanted day off.

PASSION KNOWS NO BOUNDS! (write that down). If  you can avoid connections please do so or just make room in your schedule to absorb the chicanery/tom foolery that is present-day flying. 

Ya Boy,
Reason aka Conviction

Hotdog’s Bun Bouncer

So Christmas kept me from dropping a Bun Bouncer post in your drawls.  But I got one for ya’ll this week.  Let’s start out in Chicago with Lupe Fiasco – I’m Beaming:

Wale kills this Jay-Z track:  Wale – Thank You Freestyle:

I’m not that big of a Maino fan but he kills this track.  Plus its all about getting his Tiger Woods on.  Maino – Get Em Tiger:

Sean Kingston reminds you to follow us on Sean Kingston ft. Sean Paul – Follow Me (Twitter Song):

This remix has pretty much everyone on G.O.O.D music spittin some hot ish.  Consequence ft. Kanye West, Common, KiD CuDi & Big Sean – Whatever U Want (G.O.O.D. Music Remix):

And finally since there was no Gucci last time we got some for this week.  Gucci Mane ft. Pharrell – Have It All:

It’s Young Muuulahhhh Baby!!!

“It’s Young Money like Ben Franklin baby picture!!!”  Well while Lil’ Wayne drops keeps delaying Rebirth, Young Money dropped their collaborative effort We Are Young Money.  Aside from the turrible album cover:

(Why is Wayne looking down on these cats like they are turrible rappers?  Oh yeah, because most of them are)

the album is pretty hot.  Good beats, Wayne and Drake kill it, and occasional good bars from Jae Millz.  But I can’t help but saying everyone else in Young Money is pretty much trash.  Gudda Gudda says nothing other than “Gudda Gudda.”  I can’t stand Nikki Minaj’s “wanna be female Wayne” flow.  Tyga needs to stick to putting the lime in the coconut.  About 93.5% of the normal population hasn’t even heard of the rest of them uggins.  To sum it all up just watch this video:

Birdman is undecipherable not only in his raps but in videos making fun of him.  Is that Patrick from SpongeBob on his head?  “I ain’t even on the song but I’m Lil’ Twist and I’m here.”  That ish had me rolling.  The Game’s cameo is absurd.  “I had a lotta ish up my a$$, you think some no name whack-a$$ rappers gonna matter to me?”  He says it best: the rest of YM are some no name whack-a$$ rappers.

-It’s Hotdogs Baby!!!

P-Droppa Friday

Happy Kwanzaa peeps. Since it is the Lord’s birthday, I’m going to try to keep it clean today. I hope everyone out there is enjoying time with their family and friends during the day. Cuzzzzzz you know Christmas night is when you get butt naked and ring them bells. You gots to show thanks to that special someone. So I want yall to deck the halls to “Whatever You Want” by Tony! Toni! Tone! I’m going to stop right there before I get struck down by lightning.

Aiight I had to add a Christmas video for yall:

“This Christmas” by Chris Brown

I see you Lauren London.

-Cleo

Merry Christmas From ATI

We here at ATI want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas.  Here’s a little holiday ig’nance to bring you some Christmas Cheer:

And if you are a little late on your Christmas Shopping head to the store to scoop up these gifts:

-Ya boys at All Things Ig’nant

Beat That Addiction…With This Medicine

Aye Aye Aye OK!!!  What up ATI world?  I need y’all to check this out.  This is probably the most ig’nant “commercial” I have ever seen (beware the language is NSFW):

REALLY?!?!?!? I’m glad that this is not a real product because I know some of our ig’nant  brothers, “play cousins,” Uncle Ray Rays might actually need this product.  The side effects are pretty bad though:

• Loss of rhythm
• Corny behavior
• And a desire to be white

I dunno if I could handle those side effects with out a steady plate of soul food and at least a 718 by my side.  You can pick that up at your local Walmart.

-Hotdogs

Taylor Mays had the best high school season ever, according to Wikipedia

We here at ATI enjoy (among many things) football, debating (especially Reason), and email chains (plus Gchat=passion relieving). So on our email chain we got into a debate recently about Taylor Mays, safety for USC.

I remember watching this play, dude knocked out 2 guys with 1 hit. 2, 1. The man is a physical specimen (NH) but just doesn’t produce the way you would think someone with that combination of size and speed would produce. This debate made me curious as to what state he was from. I assumed Florida, Cali, or Texas which are the traditional football recruiting power houses. So I Googled him and came across his Wikipedia page.

He’s from Washington, but more importantly peep that stat line for his junior year in high school: “As a junior in 2004, he posted 124 tackles, 5 interceptions and 75 deflections, catching 25 passes for 700 yards with 23 touchdowns and returning 12 punts for 392 yards with 10 touchdowns while earning Student Sports Junior All-American honors as a defensive back, wide receiver and quarterback.”

Uh, what?

It starts off realistic 124 tackles and 5 picks, but 75 pass deflections???? Come on, that means he broke up over 6 passes a game. So he just has cement hands? Absurd number, but it gets worse.  25 catches for 700 yards, again completely reasonable. However 25 catches for 23 touchdowns???? I started to get real suspicious now.  12 punt returns for 392 yards, I can see that. 12 punt returns for TEN touchdowns? Ok, something fishy is going on here…

The last straw though, was that he was an all american quarterback. In the words of Brady Quinn “Now I’m done”. I’m calling BS. Just one or two of those absurd stats, and I’m saying to myself maybe Washington just has garbage football. Once they threw in All American QB on top of all that I couldn’t take it anymore.  At this point myself and Booze had to reach out to one of our friends who went to the same high school as Taylor Mays, and he confirmed these stats weren’t real.

Look, I like fun as much as the next guy but we all know we use Wikipedia as a reliable tool. You know, like straight copy and pasting for a Russian lit independent study using it to help with school occasionally. Wikipedia has worked wonders for all, don’t be the guy who finds joy in ruining completely credible and accurate articles. If you are this guy I hope you get kicked in the nads by a kangaroo while simultaneously getting hit in the face with a golf club by Elin Nordegren aka Tigers Wife

Logic but you can’t call me Tuneche

Area Code Of The Week: Rachel Ray

I know what your thinking…WTF…Rachel Ray ACOTW???  Well like Hotdogs stated before, we want to cover all creeds, shapes, and ages.  I also know that you’ve looked at Rachel Ray before and said…hmmmmm under the right circumstances I would DIIHD!  Well Darkne$$ thinks we should take another look at this Food Network Temptress. So we all know that she’s not the skinniest thang bc she working with a lil extra.  But for the boys at ATI that’s just extra jelly on the toast YA DIGGGGG!  She likes to get down in the kitchen so I ain’t mad at her…looks like she can get that mouth around anything (blatant sexual reference).

So let’s start with the face.  She got that I’m a innocent lady that like to cook meals in 30 mins.  Translation…I’m a closet freak that likes to get dinner out of the way so I can play whose hand is this with my boy toys.  She tries to get the side angle suck-in to look skinnier but she just comes off as being constipated. Ohhh you don’t think that Rachel Ray is a freak nasty sex goddess??? Turns out that lil miss innocent did a spread in Maxim magazine.  Check how one goes from lady in the street to a freak in the bed!

Great news!!! She loves the chocolate! FREAK!

Oh that’s how you always eat strawberries! FREAK!

After you finish those dishes you should wash yourself you dirty girl you! FREAK!

Look at those thick ass stems…does she have a squat rack by the refrigerator? Dayum!

Not much representation in the chestical area.  That’s alright though because she knows how to marinate the meat.

Told ya’ll…FREAK!  Which only adds to her appeal.  So what rating is Rachel Ray you ask??? RR resides in Des Moines, Iowa as a 515. She is built like a college soccer girl. HAHAHA. A couple members of the ATI staff can attest to this.  Her face is cute but weird…which wouldn’t deter you from getting in there. (She also has an annoying ass voice) Would her draws get dropped? Si papi…giving her the 1 in the binary system.  Finally, she is built to take a pounding…but has no significant T-n-A game going on.  She is just Bisquik thick. RR will put something in the oven then let you put something in her oven.

JUST KIDDING…THIS PICTURE IS ABOUT AS REAL AS BUBBLE BOY BEING KIDNAPPED.  THIS WOULD DEFINITELY GET HER UP TO A 518.  TOO BAD! It’s Christmas time so I thought I would bless you with that even if it is fake.  Since it’s that time of year may RR should see if Santa put a new ass piece under the tree!  Day-Day got what he wanted in Friday After Next:

Santa’s Christmas Wishes

I’m sure it’s not going to fit in that box RR. Merry Christmas!

Darkne$$ aka Bed Flanders

This isn’t fun when they’re winning

They won, AGAIN. WTF is going on? You can’t really laugh at and make fun of a team when they win. Last week I was able to but this week its that much harder. Cribbs returning multiple kick offs for touchdowns, 42 points, running backs rushing for as many yards as Browns had this season, Mike Holmgren more than likely coming to Cleveland. I mean what is this an NFL team or something?

Which one of the following people do not belong in this category: Adrian Peterson, Jamal Lewis, Corey Dillon, Jerome Harrison, Jim Brown. If you guessed Jerome Harrison, you’d be correct. But somehow he now holds the record for the 3rd highest amount of rushing yards in a single game. Actually, I know how it happened, they played the Chiefs. The Chiefs are mizzzz, sorry Grits but they are just flat out bad. So maybe the Browns aren’t as bad as I’ve made them out to be. They beat the teams who are worse than them, isn’t that all you can ask for?

In a world where the Browns are winners I feel like I don’t know much, but I do know one thing. The Browns vs. Raiders will be a great game. I mean look at the season, when the Browns play bad teams they play great games. Lions v Browns? Great game. Chiefs v Browns? Maybe the best game in a day full of good ones. Raiders v Browns? Mark my words it will go down in history, either as the worst game every or the best.

All I got, hopefully they get their drawls dropped so we can make a return to the good ol’ posts.

-Logic aka I’m the mother F’er like milf my jigga

UPDATE:

The Browns have brought in Mike Holmgren. This team may resemble an NFL Franchise next year. This is not the NFL I’ve grown to love.

Update 2:
In my haste, I didn’t look at the Browns box score close enough. Well Reason did, and sent me this email:
ohhhhhhhh dude I totally forgot to banter with you on this. please see below.
C/ATT YDS AVG. TD INT Rating
B. Quinn 10/17 66 3.9 0 2 27.7

Those were Brady Quinn’s stats for the KC game. REALLY????? I’ve never seen QBs play as bad as he and Derek Anderson have this year. A winning QB should never have those kind of numbers. These stats make my stomach physically upset. I know the running back did his thing and Cribbs had two to the house but LG!!!!!!!!!!! This ish is not ok.