OJ Da Juiceman…You Sir Are A Clown

Posted: August 7, 2009 by Hotdogs Anderson in Musical Knowledge, Throw Your Beer, You're Better Than That
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I’m the type of person who NEEDS to stay up on the new music tip.  So I am constantly trying to find the newest, hottest artists and songs out there.  Right now there are an ish load of new artists dropping heat, and I don’t mean in the toilet.  Drizzy Drake, Big Sean, Wale, Jay Rock, Nipsy Hu$$le, etc.  However, there are some artist that are absolutely absurd and need to go away.  One example of the previously categorized perpetrators is none other than Gucci Mane protege, OJ Da Juiceman.   Let me list some things about OJ that, in the words of Peter Griffin, grind my gears.

1.  His name: OJ Da Juiceman.  There is no such thing as a Juiceman.  Back in the day people had milkmen that brought them milk, at no point did someone wake up, walk outside to their porch to grab their newspaper and their weeks worth of Tropicana.  Save that for the grocery store.  More evidence of a Juiceman being nonexistent, the fact that Juiceman is not a word.  Every time I type Juiceman, I get the red squiggly line under it.  For those of you that have never used Microsoft Word, it means the word is not in their dictionary, and in this case, not in any dictionary.  Also, the OJ part.  Why would you like to be associated with a murderer (he did it, stop lying to yourself).

2.  His look:

OJ, WHO STILL WEARS COOGI?????   I know Coogi was hot back in 93-99 when Bill Cosby was rocking the sweaters on The Cosby Show and when I was rocking them with my Girbaud jeans.  But LET’S GO!!!  Your shirt matches your crotch.  You’re better than that.  And what’s with those Tims?  Are you doing manual labor that requires you to have your entire ankle supported?  And whats with the strap on the toe?  Do you need toe support as well?  You have to be rocking orthotics and be “Gelin” with some Dr. Scholl’s too. And who still rocks a cell phone clip?

3.  His lyrical ability: 

“Oodle Noodle, Dr. Little/pocket just like Ramen Noodles/Extra loaded with that sauce/Say my traphouse gon’ supa stupid.”  Ramen Noodles really?  Isn’t Ramen what you eat when you DON’T HAVE ANY MONEY?  That is the antithesis of what you want your pocket to be like.  If you have money in your pocket it should be on something like this. And how many times do you have to say Aye’?  You have to have two studio sessions, one to drop your garbage ass lyrics, and one to just lay the ad-libs.  You, Jeezy and Jim Jones should drop a song called “Aye, You Already Know What It Is” and fill the 3-4 minutes with just Aye’s, Jeezy ad-libs such as “Yeaaaaaah,” “HAHA,” and “it’s Young,” and Jim Jones repeating the last word of whatever else everybody is saying.

Either way OJ, you are a clown.  Here’s a nice video from Broken Equipment Productions starring OJ Da Juiceman and Gucci: 

(P.S.  he’s a clown nonetheless, but OJ and and his boy Gucci still get pretty good rotation on my iTunes)

Hotdogs Anderson aka The Reason Why Your Girl is “Working Late”

  1. Logic says:

    1. I’ve only listened to him like 1 time and wanted to break my laptop in order to stop the horrociousness of what i was hearing
    2. never saw the man before, but did not picture him looking like that
    3. AYE

    Dipset for life

  2. Booze says:

    Pros: Ramen noodles, red squigglies, mapquest, fresh squeezed juice

    Cons: Making fun of milkmen, “wait, wait hold on one second”

  3. J Edd says:

    “Stupid Fruity Crazy Swagg, Jumpin In Yo Ladyy”

    One thing should be said for his ad libs however, as lyrical hard hitters like Jadakiss are getting him on their tracks for the simple fact that an OJ ad lib makes any song jump.

    Props to Gucci btw for finally cracking the mainstream audience, getting official remixes and videos with the likes of Mario, Mariah Carey and the Black Eyed Peas.

    I been on Gucci since day one, and if you want to witness somebody actually MESSING UP the autotune fad, listen to “Ride” by Gucci

  4. […] know, I brought some fire the last time his name was brought up on […]

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