All Things Ig’nant Glossary Of Terms
Banter – Nonsensical yet logical communication amongst friends. One of only a few ways in which to combat passion
Passion – Any and everything associated with non-happiness or non-ideal circumstance. (Absurd list of all forms i.e. OCBP Passion, it’s still Tuesday as I’m writing this message passion, etc.)
OCBP – Office Chair Back Pain.
PPP – (Post Passion Passion). Passion that exhibits itself after Passion has already dealt a deciding blow. Can be anticipatory in its nature ex. “I just failed my final this morning. What’s next a parking ticket? (later) Awww ish I have a f’n parking ticket. PASSION YOU KNOW NO BOUNDS!!!”
PPPSD – The tendency to experience Passion induced stress following severe exposure to Passionate events or circumstances. No language of origin….first seen and diagnosed during post Civil War reconstruction.
Hamboozlery – The act of participating in boozing. Has many derivatives based on sitch such as Hamboozled, Hamboozed, and Hammed.
Booshkin – The act of getting hamboozed, doing a generic activity, and also the act of doing nothing. Very versatile.
Generic – Adjective that suggest both that which is generic/ordinary but also unique (nonsense).
Lock it in – Process in which an activity is committed to. e.g. “Are we meeting at the bar for shots during lunch…let’s lock it in.”
Stanky Leg – nonsensical dance. Most appropriate in Bar, lounge or club setting. Less appropriate at office Printer.
The States of Tazement:
- Tazed – Half pass drunk. You are now legally dangerous to yourself.
- Intertazed – The threshold between Tazed and Well Tazed. When the threshold is crossed, there is NO going back.
- Well Tazed – The art of being in a near fictional state of inebriation where anything is possible. Usually occurs while getting Casually Aggressive.
- Omni Tazed – Truly a fictional state of inebriation that can only be attained with maximum effort and minimum awareness.
Re-Drunk – The act of getting drunk immediately from previous boozing. Can go from sober to Well Tazed depending on the level of previous drunkenness.
Well Glazed – Not to be confused with Well Tazed. Being sweaty while trying to enjoy one’s self in an environment lacking central air. Essentially you are Glazed like a Krispy Kream donut.
Well Hazed – Well tazed with a little bit of herb mixed into the equation.
Whooty – White Girl with a Booty.
Decadence (Decadent) – Outrageously and blatantly flamboyant or lacking heterosexual tendencies. Ex: That dude’s chest tattoos are very decadent. Ex: Yo…I’m sorry but Tim Tebow is a ugly dude…ND! Can also replace or be coupled with an NH.
Nonsensical – (State of being) when all reason and logic is absent in the situation/conversation at hand.
Aggressively Casual – Impossible to define. Ex: a game of casal beiruit. Ruit is an aggressive game, but playing fewer than 5 games in a given night could be considered casual.
Casually Aggressive – Impossible to define. Ex: sitting around watching a football game, and at the end of the game realizing you just finished a bottle SoCo and are well tazed.
Love To – Any activity or stich that you would like to engage in. Can be stand alone phrase, or be used at the conclusion. Ex. Gentleman Sees a whooty and says to himself “Love To”/Person says to co workers, “Getting generics post work, love to!”
LG – short for Let’s Go.
Sitch – Short for “situation” where one likely tries to engage in a later sesh.
Sesh – Sesh…LG
Tahst it – Tahst it
Gary – a guy who befriends girls but doesn’t try to get in a sitch with them.
P-Droppa – A R&B joint that makes women remove their under garments.
Throw the Ball Around – A term used for initiating a game of Beruit. Ex: Yo Logic…come thru so we can throw the ball around. Can also be synonymously used with “Putting Balls in Cups.”
Consume – Also known as consumption. The act of drinking aggressively to get Well Tazed. Ex let’s go to an establishment and consume booze before we meet up with those broads.
Establishment – any place frequented on the regular by you and your friends.
“The Establishment” – place that employs scantily clad women as “dancers” in order to “put them through college” Also known as “The Stab.”
Droppin Heat – Also known as a Heater. Taking a dump.
Parlay – Getting into a sitch.
ABP (Always Be Parlaying) – Always be trying to get in a sitch…never give up no matter the circumstances.
Smash – (aka Crush, Beat Cakes, Take Down, and Gettin’ in There) – The fine art of coitus or used to describe the rate of food consumption.
Beat Street – Where a female is taken post parlaying.
Scrill (or Scrilla) – Money, cash, C.R.E.A.M., paper, stacks, dollars, bills, Guap, Benjamins.
The Area Code System – Way in which to judges ones appearance. The first Digit describes the person’s face on a scale of 1-9, the second digit is the binary code for whether or not one would get in a sitch (1 = yes, 0 = no), and finally the third digit describes the person’s body on a scale of 1-9. So altogether a very attractive women would be roughly a 717, bombshell 819 to 919, snaggle tooth/gorgonite 303 and below. Additionally it is slightly possible to exceed the area code in hotness and enter into the elusive zip code arena as a 10110, this however is nearly impossible as this would mean perfection.
Well Smashable – (from male perspective) Female that has certain characteristics favorable to a male, WELL exceeding his minimum criteria to enter into a sitch and/or parlay with said female. These characteristics highly exceed “smashable. ” In area code terms this person would be at or above the 515 level. If either the first or last digit (often times the first is lacking) is below said five then the other digit is significantly higher to again meet the “well smashable criteria” (i.e. 417).
Less Than Friend – When a group of large women have congregated together and one of them looks smashable. But upon inspection you find out that she is not skinny she is just less than the rest of them. Ex: Ohhhhhh looks like Logic is going after the less than friend.
Greater Than Friend – When there are a group of 818’s and one of them is a little be larger and sloppier putting her in the 616 range. She isn’t bad but amongst her friends she appears larger so she is the greater than friend. Ex: Man I would smash all of them including the greater than friend.
Post Club Snipe Technique or (PCST) – The sneaky, low down, but effective female practice of parlaying a smash after the club closes in order to maintain her status as a “classy” lady.
Re-fat – A girl who’s fat then loses weight then gets “re-fat.” Ex. “Have you seen Jared from those Subway commercials? That uggin got re-fat.”
LNRB – Late Night Rude Body. Getting your late night grub on post getting casually aggressive, most likely while still being well tazed. Ex. “These girls are whack and the bar’s about to close. You wanna hit up Two Boots for that LNRB?”
Tazed Behavior – Words or actions that exhibit qualities of a person who has consumed elevated levels of alcohol; and who is releasing unhealthy levels of nonsense
Post Traumatic Og’nancy Disorder (PTOD) – whenever one is set to make the right decision they are hit with a sudden rush of og’nancy, usually developed from being raised in a hood environment, that in turn forces them to make og’nant decisions. Remedies: well there is no cure for this affliction but it can be treated by staying away from bad influences and products generally associated with the hood: purple drank, red drank, all colored dranks, the Vicks, firearms, ketchup and bread sandwiches, Pacman Jones, and Spam. Famous people who have been diagnosed with PTOD = OJ, Shawn Kemp, Antonio Cromartie, Chris Brown, Ryan Leaf, etc…
Tapioca Temptress – Any female of the Caucasian persuasion who is considered smashable by societies standards but lack glaring physical characteristics such as great J’s and a whooty. Ex. Paris Hilton, Anne Hathaway, Jennifer Aniston, etc.