Posts Tagged ‘NONSENSE’

“Grits and Gravy…killin the 2nd rate blog game right now, consistently playing both sides of the fence, battlin’ Passion, bringin’ heat when he can, and goin’ hard to the cup to get you through hump day…MAMA, THERE GO THAT MAN!”

That was actually a direct quote from Mark Jackson. The man clearly appreciates good banter. I appreciate the fact that he can bring educated ig’nance (guff, what?) to the court in the form of his NBA analysis. I actually am having a hard time in my daily life trying to not periodically exclaim, “MAMA THERE GOES THAT MAN” or “HAND DOWN MAN DOWN” whether it is appropriate or not. It may become a problem at some point. I’m cool with the president of my company, but I can’t just get up and yell “MAMA THERE GOES THAT MAN” when he strolls past my office to get some coffee can I? I mean even if he just chuckles and gives me the “I’m too rich to ask you what that means” look, he can’t feel comfortable with the fact that I am one of his employees. Similar inappropriate circumstance: If you’re a teacher and you call on the poor little sh@t who has his hand down, just because you want to humiliate him for not knowing the answer. “Manny, what’s 4X4??? Oh…judoknow? HAND DOWN MAN DOWN MANNY! IT’S 16! GET YOUR ARSE TO THE TUTOR!”

Basically I like the idea of giving a play by play to real life. If I could have Mark Jackson stroll behind me every day basically letting the people know all the cool ish I was doing, it would be pretty hilarious. Kind of like Cleotus’ personal midget that “pings” other employees around the office. Some scenarios might be strange, even though I would get a personal guff If Mark Jackson and Van Gundy waited outside the bathroom to give play by play to me doin’ work on the royal thrown….”Grits and Gravy…he had some loaded nachos earlier…2 hours later…in the bafroom…droppin it like its hot…he even brought the ESPN Magazine in there…MAMA… THERE GO THAT MAN!” My favorite is how at every commercial break in a game that he does, Mark will hit you with the recap of everything that happened. If Le’bron or Dirk or D Wade took over for that 4 minute segment of the game, he would basically hang from their nuts for a good 15 seconds leading into the commercial break. Like this clip about Kobe..

Guffaw, I mean I don’t care if you like the player or not…but Kobe can go watch this youtube video and basically sit back and be like Damn I guess I am a BAMF huh…If any normal Joe had a clip like this to go watch about himself it would solve the problem of depression in America. “Well Mark Jackson thinks I’m a bad man, he even told his mama about it…(sniff)…I guess I can step back from the ledge.” For people who already have really high self esteem, it would basically just reinforce how cool they think they are. Side public service announcement: F what you heard, and F what people think…If you are happy with yourself and think you are cool, you are…Right brotha?

 

There is too much Passion out there in the world to truly feel like your life is boring. I fancy myself quite the goon, but my lifestyle would only be supplemented by a personal reporter there to not only report the times when Passion is dropping it in my drawls, but when I’m really making plays. I guess my point is don’t be afraid to be your own commentator. Sure people may think you a bit strange, but eventually they will start to drink the Kool-Aid. If you decide to get some Post Work Casuals (PWCs) that somehow turn into PWA (Post Work Agressives), and you beat somebody in a chug, don’t be afraid to let out a “HAND DOWN. MAN DOWN” and bust the Dirk NBA Championship dance in their face.

 

GUFFAW!!

 

-Grits

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Man cuff these bish a$$ uggins, How y’all doin?

I’m Lil’ Tunchi, I’m a nuisance, I go stupid, I go dumb like the 3 Stooges

That song goes hard (even Sisquo Jr. Chris Brown).  But this dude right here does not go hard (NH):

He is definitely on something or is dumber than the 3 Stooges.  I wonder what he’s really listening to on his throwback Walkman?

What does Breezythink about this version of the video?

-Hotdogs Anderson

“Ok, I’m goin’ iiiiiin. excuse my charisma, vodka with a spritza, swagga down pat, call that ish patricia!”

It’s Friday and ATI has yet again gone onto life support as Passion has been making every effort to next day air our respective drawls down to Hades. My new years resolution is to try and bring the heat to ATI (no village people) and keep Passion at a reasonable level. In honor of Friday, I gotta take this opportunity to congratulate everyone for making it through the first 5 day work week in a long damn time. Nobody works Friday afternoons, so if you get a chance to hit this dance with a special somebody at any time today…make sure that special somebody has some cheeks.

Perfect example of men really enjoying the female caboose. They want to initiate contact with every part of their body. Can’t be mad at ’em…but shame on you for filming it and letting Grits capture your superior display of ig’nance. Shout out to Stosh for the look.

Happy Friday.

Grits

Lawwwwwwwd

Posted: November 4, 2010 by Cleotus Jenkins aka the Slow Stroka in Musical Knowledge
Tags: , , ,

Damn we are slipping here. Fellas must be working hard this week.

Moving along…..WEEZY F. BABY is out the pen! I’m bumping cash money all night long.

So on the day of Tunechi release, I stumbled across a new song/dance that is beyond trifling – “Wheelchair Shawty”. Ain’t nobody in this video handicapped. It actually will require some serious rhythm to perfect this one.

So all you cabbage patch type peeps need to fall back and let us neegs handle this one. I’ve already seen how yall butchered the Dougie (The Douglas) and Stanky Legg (Stanley Leg).

-The kid

Mike Tyson, Wayne Brady, and Bobby Brown get together on this video from funnyordie and remind us all to take a few minutes and have a good hearty guffaw. After all, it’s almost the weekend. “Every Little Step I Take” is also a hot jam, and the dancing is classic…except when Tyson does it, then it’s just nonsense. Good to see the dude having some fun with his life though. Enjoy.

-Grits

I need to find a techno girl. They are always coming in really nice with their tantalizing vocals and provocative lyrics. I mean these angelic sweethearts are trying to get you into their hearts, minds, and souls with every verse. Now some of these girls aren’t the BEST looking out there, but I mean damn…they are going to inspire an erection some type of physical and visceral response. These Europeans club tempresses will transcend you to a higher and better place. The club in general is just one of those magical atmospheres where it is fully acceptable to act fictionally…One of the main reasons most of us at ATI are fans of them. Now there are various types of club music…you’ve got your techno, trance, electro, house, hip hop and whatnot…but I feel like there is something for everyone to get down to amidst the strobe lights, illegal drug usage, half necked women, and magnum bottles. I’ve got some club music bangers to help get you through the always passionate Tuesday.

I’ll kick it off with a classic joint from DJ Tiesto, Imagination.

I don’t know who the chick on this track is, but wow. Where does she want me to run away to? The dance floor? VIP? A magical sex paradise in her dreams? A back alley somewhere? Wherever…I’ll be there real quick. This is one of those jams you could throw on before you fall asleep and get drifted away into some inception style dreams…only with a hotter, european version of Ellen Page.

This next one is solid evidence that electro beats make any female vocalist sexier. My humble opinion is that this song should have been released as the techno version and the video should be a looped version of this image.

haha, boobs…

Next 2 jams are a couple that I have been bumpin today courtesy of FreshonCampus. This first one features, you guessed it, another european electro queen by the name of Ellie Goulding. Now Ellie is not much too look at, unless you like chicks with albino hair who are allergic to sunlight…but her voice is pretty serious. This dude Tinie Tempah goes kinda hard as well. His slightly decadent british flow brought about a slight guffaw, but the beat will definitely get your butt cheeks poppin’ in the hell cube.

Last one I got for everyone is courtesy of Akon. This dude is still bringin’ the heat. “Locked Up” was a serious jam back in the day (Shout out to the 2005 Ivy League Champs)…and now Akon is bringin’ in serious money putting his nasal heavy vocals on club tracks with, yes, more club girl singers. This girl calls herself Matisse. Her real name is Brittney Smith, and she hails from Connecticut. Interested to see if she is heading up a new bread of American techno girls. The song is called “Better than her.” If you are a man who is sitched up, you always are intrigued by this statement… but then Passion calls you back to your old lady.

Fightin’ the good fight,
Grits

In the words of Logic, “I was finna” drop a new music post today… until I saw this:

DAMN, DAMN, DAMN!!!

That was just pure trash.  Let’s get a quick review:

  • Big a$$ heffa? – Check
  • Horrible rap name? – Check
  • Egregious stunna shades? – Check
  • Unnecessary grill? – Check
  • Ridiculous chest tatt? – Check
  • Too many Ed Hardy summer dresses? – Check
  • Random Black cosigner? – Check
  • Weird hair do involving ROYGBIV colored streaks? – Check
  • Ol’ girl’s kids making a cameo in the song? – Check
  • L.A. Gear light-up heels? – Check
  • TURRIBLE, TURRIBLE, TURRIBLE lyrics? – Double Check

This is just straight up whack.  There’s nothing else you can say about it.  Hi Dolla Honey needs to go back to her day job as that ghetto a$$ secretary at Mo Money Taxes:

-Hotdogs Anderson

P.S. Make sure you play close attention to when she has her grill out.  HER TEETH ARE SO BUSTED!!!  She needs to keep that grill in at all times.